“I’m going to kill you!”
These terrifying words echo through too many Canadian homes. That’s the moment when family conflict becomes life-threatening. Knowing your legal rights and protection options can mean the difference between safety and tragedy.
The Reality of Domestic Violence in Canada
Anger is a normal emotion, but healthy management is crucial for family safety. Uncontrolled anger can devastate health, destroy families, and lead to tragedy that can’t be undone.
Real Case Study: When Arguments Turn Deadly
The Family Background
A Chinese family split between two countries: husband works in China; wife cares for two young kids in Vancouver. Like many immigrant families, they pursue the Canadian dream.
The Violent Escalation
During a visit, an argument about a WeChat message spirals:
- Wife grabs husband’s phone
- Husband pushes wife to the ground and slaps her
- Wife kicks back, causing husband’s nose to bleed
- Husband grabs a broom and repeatedly strikes wife’s head
- Husband threatens to kill his wife
Witnesses: Their children see everything
Intervention: A neighbor calls 911 after hearing the commotion
Swift Legal Consequences
Police arrive within 10 minutes, arrest the husband, and lay charges:
- Assault causing bodily harm
- Assault with a weapon
- Uttering death threats
Bail Conditions:
- No contact with wife and children
- No going to the home, workplace, schools, or places of worship
- Surrender of all weapons except kitchen knives
Child Protection Response
The next morning, social workers investigate for child safety and decide what protection is needed.
Triple Legal Jeopardy
One violent outburst leads to three legal cases:
- Criminal prosecution for assault and threats
- Child protection investigation
- Family law divorce started by the wife
A single moment of rage destroys a family and brings years of legal trouble.
Understanding Domestic Violence Under Canadian Law
Beyond Physical Violence
Domestic violence means more than hitting. It includes any abuse used for power and control:
Physical Abuse:
Hitting, kicking, choking, using objects as weapons, restraining, or causing harm
Emotional and Psychological Abuse:
Criticism, humiliation, isolation, threats, control, gaslighting
Sexual Abuse:
Forced sex, sexual coercion, using sex as control
Economic Abuse:
Controlling money, stopping employment, hiding assets, creating dependency
Digital Abuse:
Spying on communications, sharing intimate images, online harassment
Common Misconceptions About Family Violence
Myth vs. Reality
Myth: “All couples fight—this is normal.”
Reality: Domestic violence is a pattern of control, not just arguments. It’s never part of a healthy relationship.
Myth: “It’s a private family matter.”
Reality: Domestic violence is a crime. It affects public safety and children’s welfare. Society must step in.
Risk Factors for Domestic Violence
Historical Trauma
Key risk factors:
- Witnessing violence as a child
- Experiencing abuse or neglect
- Growing up with substance abuse
Belief Systems:
Rigid gender roles, cultural or religious beliefs that support male dominance, or beliefs that normalize violence
Substance Abuse:
Alcohol or drugs used to cope with anger
Perpetrator Characteristics
Common emotional patterns:
- Chronic frustration, feeling life is unfair
- Fear about work, family, or security
- Past trauma or hurt
- Insecurity masked by controlling behaviour
Child Protection Laws in Canada
Zero Tolerance for Child Abuse
Canadian law bans all forms of child abuse:
- Physical punishment beyond what’s reasonable
- Emotional or psychological harm
- Exposing children to parental violence
- Neglect of basic needs
Mandatory Reporting
Professionals (teachers, doctors, childcare workers) must report suspected abuse.
Consequences:
- Criminal charges for abusive parents
- Children removed from unsafe homes
- Foster care or placement with relatives
- Court-ordered supervision and support
Investigation:
Social workers assess and can immediately remove children if in danger.
Immediate Safety Actions for Domestic Violence
Emergency Response
Call 911 right away for:
- Physical violence or threats
- Danger to you or your children
- Sexual assault or attempted sexual assault
- Breaches of protection orders
Legal Protection Orders
Family Law Protection Orders:
Courts can order the abuser to:
- Stay away from victims and kids
- Leave the home
- Surrender weapons or firearms
- Take anger management or counseling
- Have no contact except through lawyers
Government Support Services
Transition Houses and Shelters:
Safe places for abuse victims and their children, offering:
- Emergency accommodation
- Meals and basics
- Legal aid and court support
- Counseling and support
- Help finding permanent housing
Essential Emergency Contact Information
Immediate Crisis Response
- Emergency Services: 911
- BC Domestic Violence Hotline: 1-800-563-0808 (24/7)
- Helpline for Children: 310-1234 (24/7)
- Victim Link BC: 1-800-563-0808
- Seniors Safety Line: 1-866-437-1940
Specialized Support Services
Vancouver and Lower Mainland:
- Battered Women’s Support Services: 604-687-1867
- MOSAIC Multilingual Family Violence Services: 604-254-9626
- Vancouver Police Victim Services: 604-717-2889
Provincial Resources:
- Legal Aid BC: 1-866-577-2525
- BC Society of Transition Houses: 1-800-661-6129
- Stopping the Violence Counselling: Contact local health authority
Building Your Safety Plan
Personal Safety Strategy
Prepare for emergencies:
- Know safe places to go (family, friends, shelters)
- Keep key documents safe
- Have emergency cash and a packed bag ready
- Memorize phone numbers
- Plan escape routes
Document the Abuse:
- Keep records (dates, photos, witnesses)
- Save threatening messages/voicemails
- Get medical care for injuries and keep records
- Report incidents to police to make it official
Protecting Your Children
Safety Planning with Children:
- Teach them how to call 911
- Identify safe adults to ask for help
- Use code words for danger
- Help them know it’s not their fault
- Seek counseling for trauma
Legal Remedies and Court Protection
Criminal Law Responses
Police Powers:
- Arrest even without a victim’s complaint
- Lay charges based on evidence
- Recommend bail conditions for safety
- Refer victims to support
Crown Prosecution:
The Crown decides whether to continue charges. Victims cannot “drop charges” after police are involved.
Family Law Protection
Protection Orders may include:
- Exclusive occupancy of the home
- No-contact rules
- Supervised access to kids
- Mandatory counseling or treatment
- Weapon surrenders
Why Choose George Lee Law for Domestic Violence Cases
Compassionate Expertise
Our team knows the unique needs of survivors:
Comprehensive Legal Support:
- Emergency protection orders
- Family law with safety as priority
- Child custody with a focus on safety
- Property division with abuse considered
Cultural Sensitivity:
- Bilingual: English, Mandarin, Cantonese
- Understanding of cultural barriers
- Connections with culturally-appropriate supports
- Awareness of immigration concerns
Immediate Action Focus
We offer:
- Same-day consultations for emergencies
- Emergency court applications for protection
- Safety planning with experienced advocates
- Coordinated support with police/social workers
Breaking the Cycle of Violence
For Victims and Survivors
Remember:
- It’s not your fault
- You deserve to feel safe
- Help is confidential and available
- Your children need you to be safe
- You have the strength to rebuild
For Community Members
How you can help:
- Believe survivors
- Offer support without judgment
- Learn about resources
- Speak out against all forms of violence
- Support organizations working to end domestic violence
Words of Wisdom and Hope
As we tell our clients: “In Canada, we always say no to domestic violence—violence is never the answer.”
A happy family is built on respect and dignity. Real strength is shown not by force, but by kindness, love, and caring.
For Parents:
The best gift to your children is showing them what healthy love looks like by how you treat their other parent.
Take Action: Your Safety Matters
Domestic violence thrives in secrecy. Breaking the silence is the first step toward safety and healing.
Contact George Lee Law Today
If you or someone you know is facing domestic violence, we provide:
- Emergency legal consultations and safety planning
- Protection orders and court representation
- Family law help considering domestic violence
- Referrals to culturally-appropriate supports
- Ongoing legal help on your journey
Languages: English, Mandarin, Cantonese
Don’t suffer in silence. Help is here. You deserve to live without fear and violence.
This article gives general information about domestic violence law in BC. If you are in immediate danger, call 911. For advice about your situation, consult a qualified BC family lawyer.
Phone: 604-681-1611
Email: info@gleelaw.com
Website: gleelaw.com
Remember: You are not alone. Help is available.
